Pain in a Heart
by ElectricCircuslover
Summary: A note Shadow made to vent his strong emotions towards his cheating girlfriend, Sparkle.


Pain in a Heart

ElectricCircuslover: Had a lot of pain in my heart this morning. Another one of my vent stories that took ten minutes to make. I needed to clear my head is all. I'm just hurting is all. Depression does that even when no one had done anything to you. Well, here's another short story.

"Why did you cheat on me, Sparkle?" Shadow cried out clear blue tears as he wrote on his bed.

"Why did you do this to me? I offered you everything I could give and you cheat on me for my brother, Stitchie? To make matters worse you got yourself pregnant on your junior year of high school. What were you two thinking? You hurt me so much, Sparkle. I, I don't know what to do now. It was like yesterday that I felt overwhelmed with joy when we hooked up. But now that I think about it, it seems like an illusion in my head. Everything given to you and I get a slap in the face for a return.

I guess I'm a loser for that too. Loser…I'm a loser…Always the loser in the end and now I realize how much of a wimp I am I guess. So bad and overwhelmingly strong boys are your tastes I guess. So being myself isn't good enough to please you, right? You want bad influences to be your tastes apparently. So I guess changing the way I am will make me look good to you or will you laugh at me for that too. You hurt me…You hurt me soooo much, if suicide was an option I would take it. But it would be a waste because you wouldn't care if I tried. Nobody cares…Not you, not Stitchie, not even my father loves me," Shadow cried harder on the last part as he slammed his fists into his pillow.

"Okay…What were the turn offs I made to you. Was it because I was too nice or was it the fact I have a severe depression. Or maybe you hated the fact I'm shy and timid of people now? Let's see your mind split in half and take on it's own physical form. How you like it if your 'brother' tried to kill you? Oh and who was the one who saved the town from Shade? Or Shadow Stitch or maybe some other stupid evil force. If it wasn't for me you would've even had the chance to be here. But I guess that isn't enough for you. I mean, I'm a loser apparently. Too different for you or maybe for the other girls too.

Different…I'm different because I was born that way. Sometimes I feel everyone in the world hates me. I feel so alone…And now that you're doing what you did, I can't stop thinking about it. I shouldn't, I shouldn't, but I am. Worthlessness is a hard feeling and too feel it once again…Oh Sparkle…Why? Why? Why? Why? What made you do this to me? Why did you do this to me? I trusted you and gave you my word to my heart in your hands, and only in your hands. It's been dropped now. Shattered into a million pieces, pieces of pure loving emotion that shouldn't have been tainted by lack of loyalty. Am I only a boy toy to you? Will you even stop to think of the damage you did to me on the inside? Or will you have your boyfriend shut me up?

Maybe you had intentions on doing this when we first hooked up months ago. For a long time I felt I wasn't good enough for any girl and you made me feel special inside. Now…It was all a cheap sham. I can never look at you or another girl the same way ever again. Being a loser wimp as Stitchie calls me will always be me. People change my mother says, but I'll always be a loser. It's funny when I think about it. I used to look up to my brother Stitchie. Thought he was the coolest brother around…Then he started beating me up because I was didn't want to fight back. I valued you and your words, but I see how the winds change to Stitchie's favor. Knowing that everyone around me is changing…I feel left behind. Now I'm crying harder now thanks to you. Changes…It's all the changes and I hate it. Stitchie beats me up, Andy's got a girl friend and doesn't pay much of attention to me now, Spring is too caught up with some boy at school, and Berrie is so far into her studies and friends I'm invisible it feels. And my younger siblings…They wouldn't understand. It's just me…Only me….I haven't changed at all. Still timid, shy, and sensitive…The sensitivity is killing me.

I'm depressed all the time, I feel like a burdon on my friends, and sometimes I feel no one in the world cares about me. I feel so alone. But you wouldn't know that would you Sparkle Electra Lightning. Or should I say, Sparkle Electra Petals now? I thought you wouldn't change. I thought you were my girlfriend, but it seems you have changed. And I have to say that I'm going to change now. I'm no longer going to be that same Shadow you know. I'm going to be a different Shadow. A Shadow who doesn't care about anyone else. A Shadow that won't help those in need. A Shadow that will fight back. A Shadow who will show others that I'm not a push over. I'll show you. I'll show you all. I'll show you what I can be and when people ask why am the person I am now. I'll say Stitchie and Sparkle made me this way….Congratulations Sparkle. You've made me see how rotten the world is and how fake love can be. Thanks for everything Sparkle. I'm going to change…And I'll need anyone ever again. Thanks you," Shadow cried harder.

He picked up his medicine Jumba gave him to suppress the his mutation problem, which Jumba started in the first place, and dumped his pills out the window.

Crumpling up the paper, he growled deeply as he watched he burn in his paws.

"I'll change alright…I'll show them what change can do to me…" Shadow smiled evilly, wiping his tears away.


End file.
